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brendensmelissa

Brendens wife
Joined
May 17, 2006
Messages
85
Location
NorthCarolina
:D Hope you enjoy these....... Add some of your own.. keep us smiling!:)

Real advertisements 01
Supposedly, these are actual advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country.

Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.

A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.

Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.

For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.

Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.

Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.

Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.

We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.


Real advertisements 02
Supposedly, these are actual advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country.

For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy.

Great Dames for sale.

Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.

Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.

If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the Pere Lachasis Cemetery. It boasts such immortals as Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and Chopin.

Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.

The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
 
LOL...They are funny Melissa! I got an e-mail one time ago with "ad's" similar to those, but I deleted it:p
 
Melissa stop posted stuff out of my advertising portfolio.:D
 
LOL! When I dropped Rob and his wife to the airport this morning, I drove pass a sign the government of the Bahamas put on the main road for everyone to seeso him and his wife could see it. He read it and wasn't sure what it meant until I explained it and he couldn't come to:lol: He even had me stop in the middle of the road to get a photo of it!:p I wasn't going to share it because I'm not sure if I could post it, but figured i'd see if the Bahamian Gov't will get me in trouble:p
The sign said...

"Teens remember: Abstinence covers the "doggie" better than a condom"
 
:lol: I spit my water out.........Funny! That would be Brian wanting a pic of that.
We have a place called Dick's clothing and sproting goods and there is a place called BJ's its like a warehouse of food.... Anyway we were headed to the beach and saw on a sign together


Dicks' and underneath BJ's :badgrin: :badgrin:

Wow ;)
 
WOW Brenden, now i see what you see in her!!!!!:badgrin: :badgrin: :badgrin:
 
Nice one Roni........:oops: I will plead the fith on that one...........:D

Once upon a time

~~~~~~~~

in a land far away,

~~~~~~~~

a beautiful, independent,
self-assured princess

~~~~~~~~

happened upon a frog as she sat
contemplating ecological issues
on the shores of an unpolluted pond
in a verdant meadow near her castle.

~~~~~~~~

The frog hopped into the princess' lap
and said: " Elegant Lady,
I was once a handsome prince,
until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.

~~~~~~~~

One kiss from you, however,
and I will turn back
into the dapper, young prince that I am

~~~~~~~~
and then, my sweet, we can marry

~~~~~~~~

and set up housekeeping in your castle

~~~~~~~~

with my mother,

~~~~~~~~

where you can prepare my meals,

~~~~~~~~

clean my clothes, bear my children,

~~~~~~~~

and forever feel

grateful and happy doing so. "
~~~~~~~~

That night,
~~~~~~~~
as the princess dined sumptuously
~~~~~~~~
on lightly sauteed frog legs
~~~~~~~~
seasoned in a white wine
~~~~~~~
and onion cream sauce,
~~~~~~~~
she chuckled and thought to herself:
~~~~~~~~
I don't freakin think so.
 
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