Running a fish tank without arms or legs

[DolphinLVR]

Dexter,

I know the guy that helped you out In the beginning and I can tell you without a doubt that he wasn't looking to get paid!

He helped you as he has helped countless others in our reefing community without asking anything in return.

When you ask for someone to come to your place on a consistent basis, then yes people will begin to feel like they are being used.

I hope you get your system back up and going soon. Remember there are alot of us on this forum that are available to help should you have any questions, just post them up.

Sent from my DROIDX using Tapatalk

 

[dexter]

Dexter,

I know the guy that helped you out In the beginning and I can tell you without a doubt that he wasn't looking to get paid!

He helped you as he has helped countless others in our reefing community without asking anything in return.

When you ask for someone to come to your place on a consistent basis, then yes people will begin to feel like they are being used.

I hope you get your system back up and going soon. Remember there are alot of us on this forum that are available to help should you have any questions, just post them up.

Sent from my DROIDX using Tapatalk

I know that. That's why i was apologizing. The one thing I really DO need help with is getting it setup initially and then I can do it myself and not USE people. It's just too bad that he's still upset to where he doesn't want anyone to help me get my fish tank to be up and running again. I love that tank. It's what I wanted for both Christmas and my Birthday

 

[dexter]

Dexter,

Remember there are alot of us on this forum that are available to help should you have any questions, just post them up.

Sent from my DROIDX using Tapatalk

I like asking questions and I asked him all the time. this one time I was asking for some initial help and then i'll ask more questions and let my aids do the work.

 

[TJL]

Hey Brendon, not upset at all ... very dissapointed. My comment in pm to you was a quote I overheard about me from you " the perfect lil employee comes whenever called does whatever told and best of all don't have to pay him" from your lips my friend. So yes, wanted to make sure that any kind soul getting involved knew what they were getting themselves into as I'm not the only one who was taken advantage of in such a way nor is the only forum in which extremely similar threads are posted. I hope you have truely learned to appreciate what people do for you without asking anything in return.

Todd

 

[kpiotrowski]

Having only skimmed this thread I am going to take a shot at it. I have been a Nurse for 20 years now and about half of that is in Medically Intensive Home Health...the kind that "dexter" no doubt is subjected to. I use the word "subjected" to specifically because it is what is it, as it certainly was not his choice to have the accident that landed him where he is today dependant on others for every basic need from eating to toileting...changing the tv channel to scratching your ear....to getting out of the house alive in the event of a fire.

There or too many psychological aspects surounding his disabilty to get into here and create a better understanding for the layman so please allow me to just state that when dealing with somone who has had such a devastating trauma and sooooo much of their control of their own lives taken away from them, it is a time for patience and understanding and truly trying to put yourself in thier shoes. I am not passing judgment here. Just saying that sometimes people act, and react in ways we many never fully understand which may have been a factor in any missunderstanding.

What I do know for certain is when a quadraplegic gets a hold of someone that can enhance their lives in those special ways that no one else can, it is both the most incredible thing for them to have... and at the same time one of the most terrible. Because in the end it is yet another person they are completly reliant upon for the happiness you bring into their lives and creates a vunerability, a tremendous vunerabiltiy that YOU have the control over that happiness and can take it away in the blink of an eye.

I do not wish to discourage anyone to get involved with helping out here!!!! If you can only offer an hour, a phone call...a pm, I am sure it will all be for the good. Just understand that when dealing with people with this level of disability that every second of their life is a constant struggle just to keep sane...and sometimes they may come accross in ways we don't expect from people because in general they act "normal" and do not display their vunerability.

Having not walked in their shoes.....or better yet having practically EVERYTHING taking away from us. I know for one that I have NOOOOO idea how being a quadraplegic would affect me and I have nearly 10 years working one on one with them! I only hope that I would be even a fraction of the a-hole that I think I would be....and ALL of the quads I have met have been some of those most incredible people I have ever known! I have learned much from them, and in the end it is they who have enriched my life more than I could ever repay.

 

[Peppie]

He sent messages to the people to not help me out because I used him so I thought i'd make an apology to to community on his behalf.

I was never told not to help you, by anyone. I made that decision on my own based on the facts presented to me

 

[mojoreef]

Ok I dont want this thread to turn into a soap opera so lets keep it on track about reefing. If not I will be forced to close it, if the folks involved with this have issues please take it private.

thanks and only warning

Mike

 

[dexter]

It will b nice to get it going again.

 

[dexter]

I hope you have truely learned to appreciate what people do for you without asking anything in return.

Todd

When you recently spelled it out to me in pm i did and that is why I thanked you for sharing it with me. I would never intentionally try to use somebody. And for that I'm sorry, That's not me.

Apologies to the community for thread drama. I'm excited to get my fish tank up and going again and hope it will be soon. If somebody does choose to help me out it would be GREATLY appreciated and would mean a whole lot to somebody that really loves his fish tank before and hopefully will again soon.

 

[dexter]

I Could get R/O water.

I picked up 10 gallons of R/O water yesterday. That is the start. I'm not sure how much I need

 

[TJL]

Brendon, is the tank clean and empty sitting in same spot as before? I could bring enough water and salt-mix to get it started again for you. Also do you still have a working heater and Powerhead/pump???

Todd

 

[1guydude]

Hopefully the snow will be melted! Theirs a PSAS meeting this weekend....so friday may work for me....

 

[dexter]

Hopefully the snow will be melted! Theirs a PSAS meeting this weekend....so friday may work for me....

Friday is my birthday. Thank would be great!

 

[dexter]

Brendon, is the tank clean and empty sitting in same spot as before? I could bring enough water and salt-mix to get it started again for you. Also do you still have a working heater and Powerhead/pump???

Todd

There is water but it is moldy and def gross.

 

[dexter]

I picked up 10 gallons of salt R/O water. .26 i think

 

[TJL]

So I had plans to go out of town this weekend but they were canceled last minute. What are the chances of still putting my tank together? it's my birthday this Saturday!

Brendon, what the ??? is this Friday your Birthday or was Saturday January 7th your Birthday like you posted a couple of times. I think your physically limited to once a year... or every 4 years if born on Feb 29th... lol

Todd

 

[dexter]

Birthday Party I meant. lol. Last supper club is throwing an event for me.

 

[dexter]

Hopefully the snow will be melted! Theirs a PSAS meeting this weekend....so friday may work for me....

Do you think we can schedule it for another day? Maybe one where not snowing so much.

 

[1guydude]

LOL One day! It would be great if we could get a date set....maybe where todd could help me! Bob Moore frag swap is the 11th of feb...just sayin!

 

[dexter]

I remember that event. Maybe I can get it I'm going before then. That would be awesome if at all possible. I'm definitely anxious. I have 10 gallons of water and everything should be ready to setup. I hope that we can do it sometime soon. My schedule is completely open most of the time.